(no subject)

[bethehugejerk]

Who: Karkat Vantas and whoever!
Where: All across Vatheon.
When: Anytime during the week.
Style: Action please!
Status: Open.

[A curse that makes you say the truth no matter what you want is not exactly Karkat's idea of a fun time. He's not much a liar, no, and his worst secret isn't so secret around Vatheon anymore, but that's not the point. What's the point of being open if it's forced from you? And as outwardly prickly a guy as he is, he doesn't want his squishy inside exposed at will.]

[Unfortunately, as is true for every curse, life doesn't stop just because you're inconvenienced. There are groceries to get, his job at a video store to do, the coral to visit, and his usual sickle practice in the park. He tries to avoid people if he can, oh yes, but there's only so much he can do. Even if he evades them outside the hive, he can't exactly send mental waves to stop them from coming to visit him at home, if that's their prerogative. Ultimately, he's bound to run into more annoyance than he'd like. But what else is new?]

(OOC: This is pretty standard! Pick a place to meet him, and feel free to note a specific day if you have one in mind, though the second probably isn't too necessary. If there's any problem I'll let you know.)

Comments

[bethehugejerk]

No. I don't want to talk this week, not to you when you're just the kind of asshole who will probably make me say dumb things, either on purpose or by total accident. And do you really have to say that? I generally don't mean those things literally to begin with, but it's more descriptive than just saying things normally.

[Cue a clench of his teeth; he sounds ridiculous with how this curse is affecting him.]

[goodnightsweetprince]

[ Well, his smile has certainly faded once he hears these hurtful words. ]

It seems you have the wrong idea of me! I'm certainly not the kind of rectum that will make you say any dumb things! Most people, or trolls in your case, accomplish those on their own. If that is the case, however, we can postpone this conversation.

[bethehugejerk]

[Karkat's eyes narrow.]

I would thank you for your estimate of my intelligence but the curse has brutally shot down my ability to use sarcasm. People have to tell the truth this week, including answering questions whether or not they like it, which is what I meant about being forced to say dumb things. What do you even want to talk to me about?

1/???

[goodnightsweetprince]

[ There is a brief silence as he takes this in. Extremely brief. But then he smiles again and looks at Karkat. ]

Well, if saying stupid things is something you're worried about, then I have just the solution for you.

[goodnightsweetprince]

[ And now he's singing. ]

♫ You gotta siiiiiiiiiiing~ Sing about all the dumb things you wanna say~ ♫
♩ You need to daaaaaannncccceee~ Dance to make the dumb things you say seem less dumb~♩

[goodnightsweetprince]

[ Here's where the dancing starts, btw. ]

[goodnightsweetprince]

♫ When everything you say has to be the truth (that's dumb!)~
Then turn it into a song, you don't need to be a sleuth (that's fun!)~
You just need to siiiiinggg♭~~~

[goodnightsweetprince]

[ Oh. Sour note. ]

[goodnightsweetprince]

Well, it's your turn anyway!

(1/5)

[bethehugejerk]

[His eyebrow raises, wary but curious, when Gumball first mentions a solution. This guy seems to know some kind of weird science, but he's still a weirdo.]

(2/5)

[bethehugejerk]

[A weirdo who is singing good god why.]

(3/5)

[bethehugejerk]

[And then dancing.]

(4/5)

[bethehugejerk]

[And more singing, jegus christ, he's not even in tune at the end.]

(5/5)

[bethehugejerk]

[When Prince Gumball stops and tells him it's his turn, Karkat can do nothing but gape. His mouth, which had opened in shock, now hangs that way without word or sound. He is not singing. He's still trying to process what just happened.]

[goodnightsweetprince]

[ This is so normal but he pauses in Karkat's silence and then just decides to finish the song off by whistling the little flute jingle from the end of the Spongebob opening.

Well, that could have been better. ]

[bethehugejerk]

[Karkat closes his mouth a couple seconds after the whistle.]

[It's a second or two again before he speaks.]

I'm going home. Don't follow me, don't talk to me, and don't ever sing at me again.

[He'd throw in a colorful metaphor for good measure, but the curse ruins them too much for it to be enjoyable. As it stands, he turns to leave - if Gumball is kind enough to let him.]

[goodnightsweetprince]

[ He is. He may be a gumwad but he's not a jerkwad! ]

Perhaps another time, Bubba.

Perhaps another.

Time.

[ He just watches Karkat turn around to leave. Cue musical background music. ]

[bethehugejerk]

[For Gumball's trouble, he gets a raise middle finger waved backwards as Karkat keeps on walking.]

And don't call me Bubba, jackass!

1/2

[goodnightsweetprince]

[ WHAT IS THIS OBSCENE GESTURE SO UNFATHOMED AND UNNECESSARY!! ]

[goodnightsweetprince]

Honestly! You try and be polite.

And I wasn't calling you that, I know your über disdain for all names that aren't the purest and most nude form of your own. That happens to be my name.

[bethehugejerk]

And it's a stupid name!

[He stops waving the finger, but is still storming off. Not today, Bubba. Not today.]

[goodnightsweetprince]

It is a strong and royal name, regal in my family! You--you rude troll! At least my name isn't the compound word of two unrelated nouns!

[ He does science, not English. Whatever. ]

[bethehugejerk]

[Karkat stops and turns to face him, finally, though it still means yelling from down the street.]

It's a perfectly respectable troll name and it's not a compound of anything! You don't know a single word of Alternian, you squealing ignorance factory!

[goodnightsweetprince]

[ Gumball is about to initiate in the Ultimate Yelling Down the Street Battle when he suddenly gets excited about being involved in such a raw and primitive troll ritual. Though he has already insulted Karkat's name, apparently, he doesn't want to also insult his customs when it comes to, what he assumes to be, a sacred tradition.

Is it an insult to not know a language?

WELL. Gumball is prepared. ]

Du sprichst kein Deutsch!

[bethehugejerk]

[Wrong, sort of! Karkat knows precisely one word of German: schadenfreude. Unfortunately that's not enough to understand what Gumball just shouted at him.]

[So he shouts something back in Alternian, harsh and doubtlessly obscene.]