THE ADVENTURES OF A BUNCH OF BRAVE TROLLS AND SOME OTHER GUYS

[symmetrophile]

Who: Death the Kid, Lysunder (The Summoner), Kankri Vantas, Karkat Vantas, Roxy Lalonde, Shiro Fujimoto, Rand Al'Thor, and Dhaos. Also featuring a bonus Dirk Strider.
When: At various times during the curse.
Where: Various locations!
Style: No preference.
Status: Closed.

Comments

The Library - Kankri Vantas

[symmetrophile]

"So that's what she wore to the roost-warming party!" screeched a voice, high above the boarded-up rafters of the library.

"No!" cried out others in chorus.

"Yes! It was dreadful."

The harpies cackled obnoxiously, right on cue, and Kid raked his fingers through his hair in frustration, bowed over an old and weathered tome, exhaling a low note as he turned a golden eye toward the roof. There was no way he'd complete his research at this rate. Something had to be done about those gossiping harpies, and soon. Sweeping the hem of his long coat aside and giving the embroidered cravat at his throat a cursory adjustment, the impeccably-dressed mage set for the stairs.

They were still tittering amongst each other when he finally settled himself at a crouch just beneath the boarded-up roof.

"And she said--"

Kid cleared his throat, and spoke, "--that you've got the most hideously crooked nose she's ever seen!" The grim reaper turned mage was instantly rewarded by their stunned silence. All beady eyes trained on the wooden boards beneath which he crouched.

"Says who?!" demanded one of the harpies. He thought he heard feathers ruffling. Good.

"Says no one," he replied reasonably. "After all, I am only a roof."

"Well, roof," crooned another, "Come back when you've got something really juicy!"

His shoulders slumped at the realization that they were right. If he was to have any success at all, he would need professional help.

He'd have to bring out the big guns.

---

"Kankri," greeted the grim reaper, abruptly, "I can hardly believe I'm asking this, but I need your assistance, and I need it now. There is someone wrong in the Library."

[insufferability]

The whole thing had been one enormous mess for Kankri. Ever since he woke up in the tackiest robes he could imagine, he's been looking for the chance to go on and on about how this triggered him and possibly was offensive toward those with clothing dysphoria, but it seemed everyone was in the same boat as he was. He didn't care much for the challenge, because of his whole refutal of material belongings, however, he was always up to the task of helping people.

It was a bit of a surprise when Kid approached him, and as he soaked up the information his anger grew slightly. What could possibly be happening at the library, source of education where people may seek further learning to ensure that they respect one another and keep furthering their civilization? Unacceptable. Simply unacceptable.

"What happened?" inquired Kankri, his tone as curious as slightly worried. "What's wrong at the library?"

[symmetrophile]

"I was attempting to research local legends concerning the Coral for a personal project of mine, namely having to do with the potential connection between the power levels required to maintain the protective bubble around Vatheon and the use of 'curses' to produce the emotional energy to feed the Coral," explained the mage, failing to use this little thing called 'word economy' in his urgency, "But it's the harpies."

Harpies, eh.

"They've taken up the roof of the Library and will not cease their endless, inane chatter, disturbing all who try to study there! I tried to reason with them," like father, like son, as Kid heavily edits the knowledge he imparts for the sake of a desired outcome, lowering his voice into conspiratorial tones: "But they continue to make a crass mockery of everyone and everything in their sight."

Gasp. Horror. The slander!

"It's terrible, Kankri," Kid added, utterly deadpan, "I do believe I may have been--" What was the word he always used? "Triggered." YES. GOOD. "Frequently and at great length. My psyche may never fully recover. You're our only hope."

[insufferability]

"Harpies?" Kankri asked. His tone was bland, almost as if someone had sucked the emotion out of him.

"T...riggered...?" He inquired as well. This was him exerting every bit of self control he had not to let his Vantas Vein take over, which was an experience that seemed to be increasing in frequency as of late.

"Very well then." He added finally, and began proceeding toward the library, donning some extremely tacky robes along with an equally flashy staff. He wasn't exactly sure what he could do, but first and foremost, those harpies needed a good talking to, and promptly. The confines of the library should never be compromised by such idle and trivial banter, and education should never be interrupted by such barbaric beings.

"After this issue is resolved, I will attempt to my best efforts to ensure you a place in my rather tight schedule to heal your sensible, volatile, uneducated mind." He exclaimed, slightly more peppy than before. Kid, think of the consequences before you pull one of these on Kankri.

[symmetrophile]

Please, please let this work.

Otherwise, Kid noted, his jaw aching as his teeth ground together so hard he swear they creaked, putting up with this insufferable twit would have been for nothing. The irony that they both had a rather dim opinion of the other, yet Kid clearly needed Kankri's assistance, was entirely lost on the grim reaper. Leaking out between his gritted teeth was an utterance he hoped was sufficiently grateful and deferential.

"I simply can't thank you enough for your help."

God, that hurt to say.

---

At last, they were in the rafters of the library, where Kid had made his previous attempt. "They're just on the other side of these boards," he whispered, although the commotion above did a fine job of pinpointing where the offensively gossiping harpies were already.

A moment later, and he started to shuffle away. "The rest I leave to you."

KID, NO. GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE AND HELP.