Shing Meteoryte ( シング・メテオライト ) (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
oursomalink) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
vatheon2012-09-01 10:05 pm
oursomalink) wrote in vatheon2012-09-01 10:05 pm
Entry tags:
04 - August and everything after...
Who: Shing Meteoryte and Kohaku Hearts
When: Backdated to the afternoon of September 1
Where: The plaza
Style: Does it even matter, really...?
Status: CLOSED!
[ As the elevator to the island slows down and creaks to a stop, the door open to reveal a cloaked and hooded figure stepping out and into the city of Vatheon. He eyes the plaza quietly, cautiously as he steps off the elevator, sighing as he pulled the hood down more over his face.
Thus he sauntered secretively into the-- wait, no. No, he didn't.
Because even though he's been gone for about three weeks or so -- and done a good job of both training and evading people he knows (LEVEL UP! TIMES 10! ) -- it's still kind of obvious that he's there to find a certain someone.
Shing sighs quietly as he looked at the SFC again, clutching it in his fist; it hurt, really. He knows that what he did wasn't exactly the best wway to cope, but... what else was he supposed to do? He couldn't really bring himself to stay with her if he was just going to flinch and react badly every time he so much as looked at her.
And he felt much worse, too, knowing that he couldn't comfort her when she needed him most... maybe she didn't need him anymore? Would she want to see him again? Would she even give him the time of day if he approached?
Even he wasn't sure, but if there was one thing he knew, he had to at least see her. Hear her voice... see her face again... even if she rejected him, he had to. Almost single-mindedly so, too, because dammit even though he failed her, he has to see her again... somehow... he has to.
And thus he quietly began wandering towards their residence again... as opposed to mid-August where he did his best to avoid people... and her... ]
no subject
... m'sorry. I didn't know she'd left...
[ A long pause goes here as he shuffles around uncomfortably on the couch, groaning a bit before he bites back a sigh. ]
Maybe I should meet this brother as soon as I can... pretty sure Rin'll try to kill me once he finds out I'm back...
no subject
[ Even as she says this, it's obvious she misses her friend terribly. ]
I don't think Rin will kill you ... he did say something about a punch to the face, though. I'd be prepared. All in all, I think he'll be glad that you're home.
[ home ... she had told him once before that her home was wherever he was. was it the same for him? was his home wherever she was? ]
no subject
[ At this point Shing has to admit that the urge to find his way back to Celirand is strong. It's already seeming much safer than sticking around here, though he's not about to leave Kohaku behind, either. ]
Oh, boy... fun. As if I wasn't already attacked enough...
[ Shing groans, leaning back against the couch and wincing. The last thing he wants to deal with right now is a potential sneak attack again, okay? Okay... :|; ]
no subject
I'm ... going to go start dinner.
[ Rin left a recipe for a stew that might have been close to what Shing loved so much back in Celirand. She thought maybe she would try that today, since, well, he'd returned home at long last. It's a celebration, right? ]
no subject
[ Shing blinks; somehow he felt like she had something else to say there... was he imagining things? He sighed. Perhaps he'll ask later.
In any case, as he flops back onto the couch his hand brushes up against the notebook Kohaku'd dropped prior to his arrival. What was this...?
...
... well, she's not gonna notice if he peeks for a bit, right? Right? ]
no subject
The first entry of the notebook is dated to a couple weeks back. It explains everything that had happened before she started writing, from the time he left; how she had broken so badly that she needed help from their friends in order to bring her back to being at least somewhat normal ... how she had heard that writing letters to someone to help cope with how you feel might work ... and how she had decided it was worth a try. That first page is pretty tear stained, and the words are smudged in a more than a few places, but it's still fairly easy to read. She goes on to write to him that though it hurt to be away from him like she had been, she understood why he needed the distance, and promised that she would wait for him. She said that she loved him.
.... she said that she loved him many times.
The following entries had a lot of redundancy with how much she loved him, and how long she was willing to wait for him. There were entries that mentioned dreams and nightmares she had, fears she had, and pages of mentioning just little things that happened day by day ... but not one entry went by without her telling him how she was still waiting, and how much she would always love and need him.
Do with that information what you will, Shing. ]
no subject
... all she really wanted was to stay by his side, no matter what happened. Even though they'd died, Shing thought... even then, at least they were together in their final moments, weren't they...?
More pages. More of the same... her nightmares, her fears... her dreams, her hopes... Shing glances back towards Kohaku with a quiet pause of contemplation.
... he wouldn't make her wait anymore, would he? Nor would he leave again... he knew. Even during those weeks their hearts still called out to each other... when did he become so emotionally dependent on her?
Before he knew what he was doing, he was flipping to the page where her last entry was written. Reaching for a pen, he sighed quietly as he began to write... ]
no subject
Even if she knew him better than that. ]
Food's cooking ...
no subject
[ And he's done writing by the time he hears her approach, so by this point he just. Quickly puts the book back where and how he found it. Yeah, flopping it back down on the floor sneakily. Good job, bro. ]
... So. Uh... how've things been with you since, well.
Since I disappeared?
[ He already knows the answer, but he wants to hear it from her. ]
no subject
Kohaku couldn't just tell him that she was okay while he was away, because that was a lie. She couldn't lie to him. Not after they had been through so much together ... ]
... It's been ...
[ her shoulders slumped a little bit. ]
... lonely. Depressing. For a while, I couldn't even sleep and eat properly without friends having to force me to do it.
[ She still can't sleep properly, but she's at least getting more of it now than she had been before. ]
no subject
[ There's a deflated sigh from Shing as he stares at the floor; his mood pretty much drops entirely as he fidgets with his hands, trying to think of something. Anything to say. ]
I know I couldn't face you again... after knowing I failed at protecting you.
But... I guess that's not much of an excuse to justify my leaving you when you needed it most, huh...?
[ He laughs bitterly at that. Nothing joyous or happy here. ]
...
Do you... resent me for it?
[ A thinly-veiled question that hides another question: do you want him to leave? He... really doesn't want to, but if it'll make Kohaku happier... ]
no subject
At first, I was more shocked than anything ... But Shing ...
[ She looks up at him, her other hand moving to take his cheek and move his head to look at her. She looks him in the eye seriously. ]
... I have never, and will never resent you for this. You spend so much time looking after others that you never seem to really do anything for yourself, so ... I knew that you needed the time away.
[ She leans in to nuzzle him gently. ]
We both went through a really rough time ... but we can get through it together, right?
no subject
[ That stuns him into silence for a few moments before he returns the nuzzling, relaxing a little and closing his eyes before leaning against her, squeezing her hand gently.
She's definitely going to feel those tears coming down his cheeks now... it's been too long since he's actually been able to truly properly cry about this. His voice is still, quiet... so many times he'd felt himself being pushed to the breaking point of all this. So many times... he felt like he'd be driven insane from guilt.
And yet... all of that seemed to disappear thanks to her being here now... he's still searching for that happy ending now. But... perhaps what he'd been looking for ... was here all along, and he didn't even realize...? ]
Yeah... together... I should've realized that from the beginning...
[ He pulls her into a hug, hiding his crying eyes from vies as he buries his head into her shoulder. ]
... even now, it still pains me, knowing that I should've been here when you needed it most, but...
... I'm not going anywhere. Not anymore... I'll be here, as long as you want me to be...
no subject
she hugs him in return, the hand that had been formerly on his cheek now rubbing his back as she held him. she closes her eyes, tears rolling down her own cheeks ... ha. and here she'd thought she'd cried all of her tears out already. evidently not. ]
Sometimes ... sometimes it takes a while, Shing. To realize things that in hindsight, you should have realized a long time ago. Nobody can fault you for being human. Nobody can fault any of us for that.
I'm just so happy that you're home ...
[ she moves in to press a kiss against his cheek, then continue to rub his back comfortingly. ]
no subject
... m'glad to be home, Kohaku... I missed you.
[ He sighs, looking up at the ceiling and closing his eyes again. ]
... is it too much to ask to go back to before all this, do you think...? After all that... I just don't know anymore...
no subject
... I don't think we'll ever really forget what happened, even if we 'go back' to how things were before this. I don't think we really can, not completely.
But ... I do know that how I feel for you has never changed. Ever. I still love you just as much as I ever have, Shing.
[ here, she'll even take one of your hands and place it over her heart. ]
My heart still beats for you ... and it always will. This hurt, a lot, but ... I know you, and I know you were hurting badly, too. I know how badly you feel, even now ...
[ she manages a small smile at him. ]
We're still connected by a soma link, you know. I can feel what you're feeling. I know what's going on in there.
[ she pokes his own heart, for emphasis. ]
I don't think going back to the way things were before and pretending any of this didn't happen is going to make the pain go away, Shing. But we're both very strong. We both have strong spiria, and we've both been through a lot. We can stand up to this, and keep moving forward.
[ she leans in a little, resting her forehead on his shoulder.]
... don't you think that, too?
no subject
[ Even now, there's still a lot of regret and pain in his heart about what happened that day. One doubts that he'd ever really forgive himself for it.
Sighing, he closes his eyes once more and open them again. As if trying to make sure this was real. ]
... it still hurtst hat I couldn't be there at your time of need. Then, now... it still hurts. And... I doubt I'll ever really forgive myself for it. In this life, in the next to come...
And even now, I'm not sure, too... is being optimistic even enough anymore? Am I fool for thinking that it'll be okay eventually? I really don't know.
[ He hugs her tighter, nuzzling her cheek as he sighed once more. ]
... I do know that I don't want to be separated from you anymore, though. I love you, and I always will, Kohaku... that hasn't changed.
So... stay with me? I think... I'm ready to try putting this behind us now...
no subject
Of course I'll stay with you! I wouldn't want to be anywhere else but by your side, Shing. So, if that's what you want, too, then we'll stay together, for as long as we both want it.
[ and there she goes again, rubbing his back comfortingly. ]
no subject
[ Can he just. Stay like this for a while until he's sure he won't start breaking out into sobbing again? Please? ]
no subject
no subject
You have no idea how much I missed you, Kohaku...
no subject
Of course I have an idea of that, Shing ... we're soma linked, after all. That and I missed you just as much ...
no subject
[ He sighs quietly as he hugs her tightly, sighing against her shoulder and sniffling a bit. ]
... I'm not going anywhere anymore, now... I promise... I've missed you so much...
no subject
[ she continues to comfort him, though eventually she does have to get up. ]
I have to go check on the food ... I'll be right back though, okay?
no subject
Go ahead... don't be too long, okay?
no subject
[ and she gets up to go check the stew ... she's back within a few moments, and settles herself on the couch again. ]
Hey ... why don't we watch a movie and just spend some time together or something?
no subject
[ He sighs, scooting closer to her and sighing as he leaned into her shoulder. ]
Anything's fine with me...
no subject
no subject
no subject