vatheon | (no subject)

Entry tags:

(no subject)

Who: Eridan and Feferi
What: a "totally not pale at all what are you talking about we are just friends" feelings jam
Where: Eridan's place
When: early 4/16
Style: Action
Status: Closed!

[ What a party that had been! Feferi is still sort of buzzing with excitement from the whole thing. A lot went on last night. A lot. After checking to make sure that Vriska had managed to keep herself alive and breathing through the night, she decides that maybe paying her neighbor a visit as well might be in order. Gussying herself up, she makes her way over without even a word. Because that's what neighbors do, right? They totally just stop by at early hours just to pay visits and make sure the other hasn't managed to get themselves dead from a drunken stupor or something like that!

Plus it's kind of funny to see the look on Eridan's face when she stops by randomly.

Really, she does want to talk, besides just making sure he's alright. She's not exactly sure about what; there are some things she still has to do a good bit of thinking on, but bolstered by her conversation with Gamzee the previous night on certain palerom-related subjects, she's curious to test the waters, if she can. Soon enough, she's at their front door, knocking enthusiastically... now to hope he's awake, or that her knocking is enough to wake him up. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

What legacy? A legacy of being Condesce's little lapdog, of selling his loyalty to whatever highblooded troll will murder another with a smile on their face? So you'd just be like him, and only be my friend if I agree to take up a life of culling and condescension like my ancestor? I know that's not the kind of troll you want to be!

[ As angry as she's getting, she's only hugging him tighter, like if she doesn't, he might leave right then and there and then who knew what would happen? They've already come a long way in a very short span; she knows she's lucky for that. The last thing she's going to do is lose that to some old, grouchy seatroll who thinks he knows her ex-moirail better than her. ]

Listening to him would just set you back, you know it would. Eridan, I know you made mistakes. I know you know you made mistakes, but so did we. Becoming like him is just going to make things worse, and you know he doesn't want you happy, he just wants you obedient. Besides, who knows you better? Me or him?

His legacy is more than that, Fef. I know you wouldn't know, doubt you picked up a history book in your whole life--but he was highly respected! He left his impression on history, trolls remember him for the deeds he's done and so what if it was through his serwice to the Empress? That's to be expected from someone of his and my caste. Just because he followed her, doesn't mean I will. Maybe his legacy ain't anythin' compared to your ancestor, but he definitely has one. You're minimizin' him, alright? He's not so simple--not so...

[He's not even sure why he's trying so hard to defend Dualscar. Probably because he's been his idol and hero for so long, and to hear Feferi say such things about him definitely is making him get defensive.]

Look, he's not gonna ruin anythin'--he's not gonna make me like him. I'm not exactly sure what all he plans to do, but from the little bit I dealt with... I don't think his aim is pinnin' me against you guys. I wouldn't allow that anyway. I know I don't got any right to say this, but hawe a little faith in me.

[It's then that he, however reluctantly, puts his arms around her. Trying to reassure her if anything.]

And that's a stupid fuckin' question. You do, obwiously.

Edited 2012-04-24 20:47 (UTC)

[ Sigh. GLUBSIGH. Oh Eridan. She just doesn't know what to do with you, outside of hugging him right back and hair pets. ]

I just don't understand what it matters, having a legacy, if you're going to be miserable for the rest of your life to get it. Why worry about it? You could spend your afternoons getting smacked around by a jerk like that, and maybe when you're gone someone will mention your name once or twice. Or you could spend that time with Karkat, or... with me! People here don't even care if you're some old-fashioned Alternian idea of a proper seadweller.

Edited 2012-04-24 20:58 (UTC)

[That frown remains as he listens, his fins somewhat drooping at what she says, but maybe it's just the difference between them, their difference of opinion on what's important.]

I'm gonna spend my time here with Kar--and you, nothin' is gonna change that, alright? I won't let it. I'm not about to sacrifice ewerythin' I worked so hard for if it means impressin' Dualscar... But at the same time I do want to meet with him, maybe not for him to shape me into what he wants, but I think in some aspects this might fuckin' help me in ways...

[Ways that others can't. Eridan's not some easily rewritten thing, shit it took Karkat nearly 6 months to get shit through his head, and while he does hold Dualscar in high regards, he also has seen happiness, has felt it, and it's not something he's going to so willingly give up. If he was going to do that, he would have ran off to Dualscar in the beginning and ditched everyone else.]

I can't exactly explain it, Fef, but... I don't think he's tryin' to fuck me ower, alright? I mean, yeah, he hit me, that was kinda bullshit an' all--[Still kinda hurts to think about.]--but... I want to giwe him a chance. I mean, Fef, you gawe me a chance, Kar gawe me a chance--seweral chances, so it's only fair I giwe him one as well.

[ Damn it Eridan you need to stop with this logic that Feferi can't really outright argue, it's troubling and makes it hard for her to win. Both her shoulders and fins sag in defeat, but that's not about to stop her from snuggles. ]

Then promise me you won't do things just because he says so? I still don't like him and I definitely don't trust him... And also if he ever hits you again, you'll tell me and Signless, right?

[He might be cuddling to her a bit. IT'S A REFLEX TO GETTING SNUGGLED OK.]

I promise I won't, I'll fuckin' think before I do anythin' he might tell me to do--but, why Signless?

[He gives her a curious look at that. Guess who doesn't know about Signless<>Dualscar!!]

[ His question kind of baffles for a second, but at least the momentary distraction gets her to perk her fins back up-- no one likes a sad-looking fish princess. ]

What, you didn't hear? They're moirails now, Dualscar told me himself. And I think his moirail deserves to know about that kind of thing!

[It's not like Eridan and Dualscar have had many relationship based conversations, if at all. Eridan was trying to hide his relationship with Karkat from Dualscar after all.]

... Oh. Oh wow, fuck I had no fuckin' idea--Signless? Really? Hmm... Well, I'll be sure to inform the two a you then, alright?

[Though, this just further proves--at least in Eridan's eyes--that this thing with Dualscar probably won't be as bad as Feferi thinks. If he's allowed himself to become moirails with Signless, then obviously he's changing and not for the worse.]

[ She actually can't be too disappointed at the turn of the conversation, even if she's still wary. It gives her a good opportunity to test the waters on the other thing on her mind. Don't mind that little smile at all. ]

Speaking of moirails, what about yours?

[ Score! Feferi: 1 Subtlety: 0 ]

... What about mine?

[Right over his head... Okay not really, he's trying to play dumb here, because wow Feferi what are you getting at.]

I don't hawe a moirail.

[Please don't be going where he thinks this is going, please. Please.]

Edited 2012-04-25 01:06 (UTC)

Nothing! I was just wondering, is all. Got any good prospects then? Come on, gossip with me!

[ Feferi is going two for two against subtlety! ]

[Fef....]

Not.. really. What about you?

[Eridan can play this game.]

Sorta kinda!

[ Okay okay, play this cool, Feferi. You can do this. You have the power. ]

But I don't think I should talk about it until I'm a little bit more sure about it. I don't think you'd tell them on purpose, but what if it accidentally slipped? Or they asked and you couldn't lie?

[...Oh.]

[So... She. Figures… He's an idiot playing with the thought it'd be him she'd be considering again anyways. Even if they might have had some more-pale-than-not moments--a little bit ago being a good example. He sinks a bit, maybe even starts to lean away from her, however he doesn't really even notice he's doing this.]

Oh...

[Come on, Ampora, stop acting like you have a right to be disappointed.]

Well, what the fuck? You think I got some loose lips or somethin'? Pffft I can keep secrets, Fef.

[Yup just gonna try to act like he's not disappointed, because what right does he honestly have anyways?]

[ Feferi lets him back away a little, but keeps a good grip on him. Trapped! ]

It's not that. It's just, you kind of know him. Not even just kind of, you definitely know him. And you are very close to him.

[Who the fuck is she talking about? It's not like he's crawling with friends--let alone ones he'd consider close. He offers her a stern, yet confused look.]

Will you just spit it already? I promise I won't say a damn thing, no matter how close I may be to this mystery brinesucker.

Edited 2012-04-25 06:22 (UTC)

Are you actually going to make me say it?

[ Now look, now she's blushing! Suddenly subtlety is up a point ahd she has no idea what she's doing because she hadn't intended to say anything about it just yet. She just wanted to fish around for his hypothetical responses, and not actually admit anything! ]

As far as potential moirails go, do you really think there's anyone else I could get to play Cowgirls and Wizards with me? Which, by the way, is totally a deal breaker.

Well yeah--

[Wait. Waaait a minute here... Cowgirls and wizards? So he.. she... he was right. Those moments weren't just ranfom more than not-pale moments, she actually has pale feelings for him again.]

[This relieves him, a bit, before he starts to feel that tightening in his chest from a jab of guilt. He knows damn well he doesn't deserve thise feelings. After everything he's done, but especially what he dis to her… Whatever hold she may have on him, he's trying to pull from it. This isn't right, maybe he has similar pinkish feelings but... no he honestly can't, she deserves better than her own murderer as a moirail. She might have forgiven him for what he did, but he's far from giving himself the same undeserved pardon.]

... Tell me you're not serious.

[He's really trying to hide that tremble in his voice.]

[ If he's really determined to get away, she'll relinquish her hold on him-- but she definitely seems a little bit disappointed when she retreats into herself, and it shows with how uncertain she looks. Saying something couldn't have been a mistake though, right? ]

Yeah I'm serious! I wouldn't joke about that, that's just plain cruel.

Fef…

[How could she honestly want him back? After everything...]

Why? I mean--sure I'm tryin' to better myself, make up for what I'we done, but look at all the shit I caused--I might be doin' better now, but I still did all of that. I know you said we're square... but, I--[Can't forgive myself.]

Fuck. Look, I'll be a upright chump and say that maybe... Maybe I'm harborin' my own pale feelin's that got no right to be there, but you deserwe better.

Edited 2012-04-25 07:06 (UTC)

Eridan.

[ Playful pantomiming aside, she doesn't really know what to tell him, and that's why she wanted to think this through a little more. In retrospect, she really should have waited. Not she has to figure out on the fly how the heck to counteract his apparent resistence-- though she wouldn't have guessed it of him, even if she did have time to ponder things over. ]

I know you did a lot of stuff... a lot of stuff that maybe a good moirail could have helped prevent. That's why trolls have moirails to begin with! I know it sounds really dumb and crazy and that I shouldn't, but... [ But what? Should have thought this through a little better. She has a lot of things she could add there. A lot of things. ]

Maybe we both could have done things differently, and maybe we could give it another go.

[He stares at her for a long few moments, before adverting his gaze. He sucks in his bottom lip, chewing at it as he thinks it all over...]

I don't know... I don't think I can honestly allow myself the chance to fuck things up with you again. Maybe it's not exactly right for me to shoulder all a the blame, but Fef... I know I don't deserwe this chance you're offerin'. It's been made fuckin' clear to me how much of a piece a seascum I am, and you don't belong with filth…

But you've already done a lot for me here.

[ If she can't hug him, then she'll at least reach out and put her hand over his. It's the least she can do. ]

Like, do you think I'd say it if I didn't think there was at least some kind of chance it could work out? Because it totally could! We made our mistakes and we learned from them, and also you're not filth. Anyone that really and honestly wants to be a better troll is not filth. I can't make you do it, but it would be nice if you'd at least consider it seriously.

[Again with a pause to ponder this over. He really can't argue with that. It's not like he's trying to excuse what he did, he's trying to be better, trying to show he's sorry... but even still, even if all of them forgave him he's still at odds with himself. Everything he's done is for the benefit of those around him, but none of it has been done to help himself get over the betrayal he committed. Really, he's just stewed on it all, let that considerable amount of self aimed ire fester and it's doing quite the number on his decisions right now.]

Fef, I still don't know. I mean, I do think we could work, but...

[His continual fight is looking more petty and weak by the moment. Probably because while he knows he doesn't deserve this, he's still a self serving troll and it's hard to deny himself what he wants even if it's something he has no right to have--like Karkat. Oops, there's another ping at that thought. He's definitely skilled at making himsef feel like shit.]

Then why not?

[ If only she had any idea how much internalized guilt tripping was going on, she might say something else. Of course she presumes there's some kind of guilt there, but not the extent he's taking it. Instead she sits there utterly clueless, and wondering why the heck he's so resistant. If she were Eridan, she would be jumping at the chance!

What if he's changed in more ways than she thought? Oh man, this is hard. Feelings are hard! Why do there have to be so many feelings? Sure, she still has to wonder what people are going to think about her moirailing her own murderer, but to hell with them! It's not like he can go back in time and keep it from happening anyway-- that would just splinter the timeline and no good would come of it. But if he's willing to move forward, then so is she. Maybe moirails is too much? Too soon? But it just seems right. They know each other so well, and for so long, and there's really so much potential that they never got to live up to, and now she knows what to do if things aren't working. (That is to say, to not wait until her wits end and then dump him after everything they know and love has been wrenched away. Possibly not her best decision ever.)

Too many feels for a fish princess to handle all at once, that's for sure. Good thing she already had them a while ago, and now she's just left to smile at him and stare him down, waiting for his answer with hopeful eagerness. ]