Being robros

[stayb100ponyboy]

Who: Equius Zahhak and Dirk Strider
Where: Equius' workshop
When: backdated to immediately after this
Status: Closed
Style: STRONG and manly

After getting off the SFC, Equius wanders up to his workshop. It takes a little digging, but he manages to unearth the solar surfer he and Jim were working on. It's been quite awhile since then, and the surfer is pretty dirty, so he settles in with a rag, wiping it off and waiting for Dirk to arrive.

Comments

[stayb100ponyboy]

"Oh." And then things suddenly got awkward. "I'm sorry to hear that."

Pause.

"Did you have trolls in your session too?"

[shippingmath]

"Eventually," Dirk admits. Because, thanks to Gamzee, they did. "Not in the way the previous human session did, though. We never got trolled by anyone. Instead, we got a so-called brother and sister pair using reversed quirks, bothering us in the time leading up to our game and basically leaving us the fuck alone once it actually started."

[stayb100ponyboy]

"But they weren't trolls? What were they?" Equius is a little disappointed, he was hoping that their session crossed Dirk's, even though he'd be too dead to experience it.

[shippingmath]

"Roxy'd know better than I would. The helpful one always talked to her most. I usually got the dumbass who thought cuddling was x-rated." There's an eyeroll in there somewhere.

[stayb100ponyboy]

Snerk. "He didn't like cuddling?"

[shippingmath]

"Even worse. He liked it, he just thought it was the filthiest thing he'd ever seen." This is the kind of conversation that has an incredible potential to get awkward, but Dirk's just talking about it nonchalantly. Mostly because Caliborn is just so ridiculous most of the time.

[stayb100ponyboy]

As someone who likes cuddling but is too afraid of hurting people to do it often, Equius shouldn't be finding this nearly as amusing as he is. "How, exactly, did he decide that cuddling was filthy?"

[shippingmath]

Dirk shrugs, and finally gets back to putting the hoverboard together. "Hell if I know, but he considered it porn." Most random thing he'd ever drawn, but Roxy had gotten a good laugh out of it.

I'm sorry, I had to

[stayb100ponyboy]

"Ridiculous." Equius works with Dirk on the hoverboard for a bit in companionable silence before he has another question. Something Dirk said earlier reminded him of it. "If you didn't prototype anything before entering the game, who were your sprites?"

you did. It was required.

[shippingmath]

This time, Dirk almost drops the piece of hoverboard he's working on. He focuses on steadying it before he actually begins to respond. "They got prototyped eventually, but we mostly didn't get a say in it. Some weird-ass clown showed up and started throwing bodies in them."

[stayb100ponyboy]

Equius assumes the clown Dirk is talking about is Kurloz. Kurloz is weird, and a clown, and from Dirk's session. It just makes sense!

"What bodies?"

[shippingmath]

"Troll bodies. From your session." This is sure to be an awkward line of conversation. Dirk finally turns around anyway, because if it keeps up Equius is going to ask what Dirk specifically prototyped.

[stayb100ponyboy]

Oh, it certainly is! Equius runs through the list of dead bodies that he knows about in his head, and it doesn't add up. "But there were an odd number of dead bodies from our session. Unless you combined three together, it doesn't work out."

[shippingmath]

"We got an odd number of bodies prototyped, too. The others all got two trolls in unholy combinations. I only got one troll." Guess which? It probably isn't too hard, considering he wasn't even turning to look at Equius before.

[stayb100ponyboy]

"Tell me you didn't get Eridan." Nothing is more important than Dirk not being straddled with Eridan in his game.

[shippingmath]

"Nah, Jake got him and Sollux. Which was a clusterfuck and a half that he seemed entirely unaware of. Roxy got Feferi and Nepeta, they always had a blast together."

1/2

[stayb100ponyboy]

"That's good, Feferi and Nepeta get along well." Equius thinks for a moment. "So that means you got either Vriska, Tavros, or..."

2/2

[stayb100ponyboy]

"... me." Equius perks up considerably at that. "Did you get me, Dirk? Was I your sprite?"

[shippingmath]

"Yeah, you were." He finally cracks a smirk. "Let me tell you, even as a sprite, you are the goddamn champion of staring."

[stayb100ponyboy]

Equius breaks a rare, open smile as well. "How exquisite." Really, if he was going to be a sprite, he'd want to be Dirk's sprite. "I hope I was a good guide to you."

[shippingmath]

He shrugs. "You haven't had much chance yet. We're at a dead end, with no damn sources of grist. 'Sides, I didn't do a second prototyping for a fucking long time. Had to fend off that clown with a bunch of shitty soda to keep him from bugging me about it."

[stayb100ponyboy]

Again, Equius assumes Dirk is talking about Kurloz. "What did you prototype me with?"

[shippingmath]

"With my auto-responder." From the way Dirk says it, it isn't a decision he was happy about.

[stayb100ponyboy]

"What's an autoresponder?" Equius catches the change in tone. "Were we not a good combination?"

[shippingmath]

"An AI I made a couple years back to handle messages when I was busy doing shit. Only problem was, I intended on making him as similar to me as possible. This was back when I was thirteen. Since then I've grown and he's developed as a program, and gotten really fucking pretentious and basically goes out of his way to undermine me. Giving him the kind of agency that comes with having a corporeal sprite body was a dumbass fucking idea that I never should have followed through with." By the time he finishes talking, Dirk's hands are clenched at the edge of the table. He doesn't even notice.