vatheon | (no subject)

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(no subject)

Who: Equius Zahhak and whoever
Where: various places around the bubble
When: evening/night
Style: I'll follow
Status: open

He had been STRONG enough to fend it off for a long time, his instinctual use of the Void protecting him, or maybe the chucklevoodoo that still lurked weakly in his head offering some form of resistance. But he hadn't been able to hide from it forever, and when his blue fairy had melted for the last time, it had seeped onto his clothing and hands and face, changing color and becoming... bloody. Equius had looked down and seen bright, garish splashes of blood all over his shirt and hands, olive and indigo and bright mutant red and even traces of deep, fatherly blue, all blending and washing together.

He would hurt them, he'd hurt all of them, possibly even kill them, because he couldn't control himself, he was too STRONG, a freak, a monster... and so he'd fled, not telling anyone where he was going and not answering his SFC, retreating into his own private hell and wandering the bubble aimlessly.

No matter how hard he tried, the blood stains wouldn't come off.

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[ The one awesome thing about being a strange alien minority in a city filled with humans was how easy it was to recognize one of her fellow trolls. This time, it's no Eridan so there's no biting or globe-kicking.

This time, actually, it's technicolor splashed Equius.

That probably should have warned her off, but on the other hand...

Nope! ]

Hey there, water you doing?

[ She's as cheerful as can be when she approaches, though it's not like she's his biggest fan or anything. ]

"Equiuuuuus?! Equius, can you hear me?? Where are you??"

Do you hear that, Equius? That is the sound of a distraught moirail, blessedly free of the curse herself but frantic over not being able to find him, worried beyond belief after what she's seen other people go through. She's been following his scent for ages, in what seems like circles almost, and she cannot help but think that she must be getting closer by now.

[Equius does stand out in a crowd, even when he's not an alien minority.]

[His head jerks around at the sound of Feferi's voice, and when he sees her, his pupils shrink behind his glasses and he shies away. He knew she had left the bubble, thanks to Sollux, but he didn't know she was back. He also doesn't expect her to remember their time as moirails, but he still does, and a splash of bright tyrian blood appears across his shirt.]

Don't come any closer!

Oh, he hears her all right... every time he hears her voice, the olive blood on his clothing gets darker and heavier. He doesn't answer, instead moving away from her. It tears him apart to do so, but... but better she's worried and upset than dead at his hands.

And yet she doesn't give up, even if it seems like he's almost deliberately trying to avoid her. That could never be it! Ever since they got back together they've been closer than ever. If Equius knows his moirail at all, he should know she's not going to stop looking until she finds him - or until an obstacle gets in her way that she can't overcome.

It's tearing him apart to hear her call him and not respond, but with so much of her blood on his hands, he can't stand facing her. It's better this way, and someday she'll realize that too.

He's not as good at evading her as he thinks he is, though, and the distance between them keeps getting smaller.

She senses that, knows she's getting closer, feels him somehow through more than just scent and is gripped by the paralyzing certainty that something is wrong with him. Her pace gets faster, near a run now, ceasing her calling for him since that hasn't helped so far. Better save her breath to try and get to him faster.

... she stopped calling for him.

Equius is too wrapped up in his despair and anguish to feel that she's still nearby, and he huddles in a convenient corner. He's a monster, a freak, he can't control his strength and all he does is hurt those he loves, she probably stopped calling because he killed her, and he puts his head in his hands and shakes.

"Equius! There you are, oh my paws I was so worried!!!" Yes, that is indeed a convenient corner, and she is going to ignore everything in favour of crawling into it with him, paying attention to nothing but the distress he's in. "Shoosh, shoooosh, what's wrong?"

Equius' ears perk up at the sound of her voice, but then he just tries to mash himself even further into the corner, wedging himself into a little ball. "Don't come any closer!" His voice is rough and cracked, like he's been trying to hold back tears. "Don't touch me!"

It's really luck more than skill that leads Gamzee to find him. When Equius hadn't come home, he had gotten worried. When he hadn't answered his SFC --sorry, man, you might have about 42 messages in your inbox now-- he eventually had set out to look for him. His own fears follow him, trailing behind him like a ghouls spectre of things he'd rather not think about, but after having hashing at things with Karkat earlier in the week, at least his doppelganger had gotten real quiet, kept to his motherfuckin' self, just fuckin' stood there and stared. He could deal with that.

He wanders the dark, foggy streets for a while, before suddenly the familiar outline of Equius' husk cuts though the fog, and he speeds forward, using that rarely used flashstep to come close enough to Equius to wrap his arms around him in a tight squeeze. He isn't even saying anything, just squeezing.

It's probably for the best that Equius doesn't see Gamzee coming and gets hugged from behind; if he saw that doppelganger following his matesprit, things would... not end well.

As it stands, he freezes, every muscle gone tense and rigid. He would recognize those skinny arms, with their wiry, clowny strength, anywhere, and he knows exactly who is hugging him. He also knows exactly whose indigo blood is dripping off his shirt.

"Let me go," he whispers, his eyes wide and rolling behind his shades. "Let me go, let me go!"

Too late, Equius. Her hands are all over him to check if he's hurt, before she cups his face and makes gentle shushing sounds. "It's fine, sillyhead, you're fine. It's okay, I'm here, shoosh."

That does take a few moments to sink in, partially because Gamzee is still feeling the joy of Equius not being gone and partially because it is not exactly a comment desire between the two of them. When it does penetrate his skull though, he releases him easily, though he remains close.

"Equius? Babe, you aight?"

Equius goes limp and pliable as a rag doll as she insists on touching him, hoping against hope that if he stops using his muscles all together, he won't accidentally hurt her. When he does, though, his shirt and all its multi-hued stains are revealed.

"Stop," he protests, trying to scare her off with his voice alone. "Stop it, I'll hurt you, I can't control it, I'll cull you and it will be all my fault..."

As soon as Gamzee lets him go, Equius pulls away, putting distance between the two of them. He still doesn't turn around; he doesn't want Gamzee to see him this way, all stained and horrible and out of control, and he wraps his arms around himself in a sad attempt at self-comfort.

Indigo blood drips off his hands and splatters on the ground near his shoes.

"Don't touch me," he mutters. "Don't touch me, I can't control it, I'll hurt you if you touch me..."

"Oh no...no, Equius, what happened??" If there's concern in her voice it's only for him, dismissing the very thought that he could ever hurt her. To her mind it simply isn't possible, just as him attempting to scare her off will never ever work either.

"I'm a monster!" he yells at her, hoping that by raising his voice, she'll retreat. He very rarely raises his voice to her, maybe that will let her know that he's serious. "I can't control myself, I'll just hurt everyone I care about..." He gestures with his chin to his shirt, covered in lurid blood stains.

"You are NOT a monster!" The only result of him yelling is that she's trying to yell even louder. It's rather obvious by now that she's not going anywhere, the bloodstains only making her the more determined to stick by him. "You've never done anything but look after and help people! Now calm down and tell me what happened!"

"Yes, I AM!" he yells back, getting further agitated by her agitation. "Look at me! I'm a freak who can't control his STRENGTH! I'm going to hurt you if you come close to me!"

"Not! Not, not, NOT!!!" She flings her arms around his neck, presses her cheek to his. "You won't hurt me, Equius! You could never ever hurt me. You have more control over yourself than ever, you've been working so hard at it, you know that!"

Equius flings his arms behind him when she hugs him, and he swears he hears his shirt make a sodden, squelching sound as she presses against him. "Don't! I'll hurt you, I can't control it!"

That's fine. She'll make him buy them new matching shirts once this is over. It's not like she hasn't been covered in blood before - although she doesn't want to think too hard about where this particular blood may have come from.

"Shoosh. Shoosh, Equius. Yes, you can. Just like Darkleer taught you. Just close your eyes and focus on relaxing. I'll be right here, it's going to be okay."

"Babe." He keeps his voice low and soft too, coaxing and calming. "What did you wrong? You know you ain't ever put the hurt on me. Is it this motherfuckin' wickedness what they did spell upon us?"

"I... but..."

No, okay, she's right. He's practiced this with Darkleer, he's gotten a lot better, he can handle doors and Faygo bottles and even hold hands now. He's worked hard at this, he's not a loose canon anymore.

"Don't leave me," he murmurs, and he closes his eyes and tries to relax.

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