vatheon | I Never Wanted Anything So Much

Characters: Dave Strider and Jade Harley
Location: Dave's Room; Coral Corral; 6
Time: Right after this thread
Status: Closed

What does one do when Jade is on a mission to find out what you aren't telling her? He could come clean via text and it wouldn't be so awkward. He could. Seriously. He could do a lot of things, but avoiding her would eventually be impossible. They lived in the same god damn house for Jegus sake!

So what does he do?

Well, he does have this clothes pile (which he was going to clean that day but...). Obviously the master plan is to hide in that pile of laundry. This couldn't fail. She'd never find him. His master ninja tactic (He's aware how ridiculous this all sounds honestly. Dave is pretty good at lying to himself apparently).

Which is why he's hiding in that pile of clothes now. Now, this probably wouldn't be so blatantly obvious, but Game Bro Strider was trying to tug at a pair of pants, unable to actually unearth the hiding Strider.

Obviously, Jade won't find him.

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

[Except for the part where Jade not only has Bec's freaky teleporting powers and thinks to check his room first, but...she may have some doggy influence in her nose now as well. At the first and most obvious sign that Dave isn't in a visible place, she sniffs and turns to the laundry pile.

HELLO, DAVE.]

Dave! Come out of there!

[Oh screw your dog tier powers. This isn't even a fair fight anymore. This is cheating. You're like the broken character in a video game. No one can beat you.

And because he's on a streak.]

Oh fuck no. This honest to gog pile of my clothes is comfortable. I'm not leaving it.

[Dave is secretly like five.]

What if I shrink the clothes pile, Dave, huh?? I am not the Witch of Space for nothing!

[SHE HAS NOT YET REACHED HER BROKEN LIMITS. After all, the level is "no one should mess with you, not even me".]

You can deal with getting me new clothes then!

[Wow. This is just the most mature thing ever.]

I'm not leaving. I'm comfortable, believe it or not. Clothes piles are more comfortable then people admit. I'm getting my daily dose of sitting in my laundry time right now.

[Well fine, he forced her hand.]

[THIS IS JADE ALL UP IN YOUR CLOTHES PILE, DAVE.]

...Hehehe, these boxers are cute.

[SCREAM...]

Woah, hey. We do not touch Dave's cool fucking undergarments. That's meant for Dave Strider, and only Dave Strider. You're cuter anyways. [WELP Looks like getting him to spill won't be so hard.] I mean, you're fucking adorable. Fuck.

Well, it does not seem like you have washed them yet anyway. I would like to think I'm at least cuter than unwashed coolkid boxers.

I was going to wash them today. Then I decided that it was time to have a solo feelings jam in my dirty fucking laundry. And you are. The list of what's cuter then you is shorter then the list of things that's not as cute as you. THere might as well not be a list because you're at the top. [FUCK. What is even coming out of his mouth now.]

[...These blurts seem to be getting more and more frantic.]

Okay Dave, I think it is time for you to spill that thing you're hiding from me.

[That's because they are. And he's positively losing his shit.]

I have no idea what you're talking about. I'm not hiding anything. You've already found me. Hide and Seek is over.

This isn't Hide and Seek, this is "Dave I am sitting in your dirty laundry while you keep blurting out that you think I'm cute, what is going on?"

Hey, you chose to sit in my dirty laundry. I didn't do anything to make you do it.

[Avoiding the actual question. Why yes he is.] I didn't say you had to join me in my dirty laundry. Solo feelings jam remember?

Feelings jams don't work that way, oh my god! [DAVE. Dave seriously. Seriously now Dave, she is freaking out.]

I would sit in your dirty laundry all day if it meant finding out whatever was bothering you!

I want to fucking ask you out okay? Jegus christ!!

[Oh shit he said it.] That's the secret. That's what I've been hiding. I, Dave Fucking Strider, want to ask Jade Harley out but apparently I don't actually have the balls to do it. Except now I've said it because this stupid curse decided it can't be a secret.

...Woooow.

[Wow, really. Really. She was worried!!

Then again if Dave actually had something seriously wrong with him, the secret Kids Taskforce would have figured it out already and reported to each other.]

You mean like...you want us to be a thing? A thing that people would know about and involves remembering certain dates and all?

[This is a big deal to him okay? Get out, Jade.]

I want us to be a thing. Let's be an item. Let's go steady. Go out with me. You and me, we can be together. I'm flushed fucking red as red for you. Harley, how many different ways do I have to ask this before I get a straight up answer?

Gosh...just once would have been enough, but I guess I sort of...was in shock!

[It is a big deal to her too, gosh. It's not everyday you get asked out by your super cool best friend.]

My answer is yes, let's be a thing!

[Oh. Okay. Honestly wasn't expecting her to say yes.

So now he's a bit at a loss of words.]

...Okay. Well. We can get out of my pile of laundry then.

Oh yeah, I guess so.

[BUT THE LAUNDRY PILE IS SO MUCH FUN!!!]

[Except no, it smells like awkward teenage boy. Fine. Her freaky space powers brought her there, they can bring her back out again. Riiight where she was when she originally came into the room.]

Having a first date be in your pile of laundry would be silly, after all!

[He's climbed out and picks up the baby chocobo that's been trying to join them since they were in there. Hey Game Bro Strider.]

We're not having our first date in my laundry. I'm going to make sure to sweep you off your feet that you'll be putty in my hand, Harley.

Gotta court you in a legit way.

I Never Wanted Anything So Much

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