Kratos Aurion (
strength_of_tomorrow) wrote in
vatheon2012-12-04 04:23 pm
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Entry tags:
Stuck with each other
Who: Kratos Aurion, Zelos Wilder
When: Backdated to Nov. 26th
Where: Ordo 3
Status: Closed
[Preparations were finally coming together for the Rune Crest, they just needed a proper healer. Since Kratos isn't entirely sure that Zelos won't be attempting to hide people from him, he's shown up for a surprise visit early morning on the first day of the curse to talk about it in person.
Good morning, Zelos. Have an angel knocking at your window.]
When: Backdated to Nov. 26th
Where: Ordo 3
Status: Closed
[Preparations were finally coming together for the Rune Crest, they just needed a proper healer. Since Kratos isn't entirely sure that Zelos won't be attempting to hide people from him, he's shown up for a surprise visit early morning on the first day of the curse to talk about it in person.
Good morning, Zelos. Have an angel knocking at your window.]
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Zelos gives a small glare before hauling himself off the bed and heading over to swing the panes wide. Normally he would tell Kratos to get lost, but seeing as the man never shows up without a reason - and it's usually a good, if annoying reason - the redhead is disinclined to ignore him. Especially considering he hasn't forgotten about the crest.]
If you live for a certain amount of time, do you just outgrow doors?
[That doesn't mean he has to be nice though.]
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[He tried to just come early to avoid just that - of course, all he's done is managed to wake her up by getting inside the ward in the first place. Zelos will be hearing words about how irritating Kratos is again, that's for sure.
Kratos flies into the room, but doesn't sit down.]
We have all the materials for a crest, but we need someone with strong healing abilities to put it together. Do you know anyone?
[Just try lying to his face. Kratos is watching very closely.]
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[It looks like it leaves a sour taste in Zelos' mouth to be so truthful but this is Lloyd's future at stake. Even so...]
She's too interested in the crystals if you ask me though. She spent a week as a Cruxian angel because of a curse and I'll be damned if she wasn't happy about it.
[He crosses his arms uncomfortably.]
Not really a fan of the idea of her studying one up close.
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[There is one thing that makes him pause, though.]
You do not think she would attempt to make a crystal knowing the process, do you?
[He's not sure he'd want someone who would do that working on Lloyd.]
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No, no, I don't think she'd do that...
[A sigh.]
The whole thing just rubs me the wrong way. I mean, these things are a curse, not a blessing.
[There are times when he wonders if he's even human anymore, made worse by the very existence of people like Kratos and Mithos. Living that long messes you up, skews your perspective into something unrecognizable. He's already done for but he can hope the same fate doesn't befall Lloyd and Colette, at least.
Damn you Kratos, facilitating him activating it on in the first place. If he hadn't had to sneak around and play the betrayer, he could have just been normal.]
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[Even if she would, he would consider it anyway. They're short on options here, and Lloyd was obviously uncomfortable with the idea of a stranger helping him. Someone that Zelos knew was the next best thing. He knows Lloyd trusts Zelos - far more than he should, in fact.]
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...Zelda. She's beyond good with that kind of magic.
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1/2
[Zelos lunges forward and grabs Kratos' wrist to keep him from charging downstairs.]
She hates your guts, man! If it was anything else I'd let you go get creamed but this is important, so I'll do it.
[He gives Kratos another sour face at that though. He may want to help Lloyd just as much as Kratos does but that doesn't mean he has to enjoy doing Kratos any favors. He lets go of the older man's arm to go downstairs himself.
Only Kratos' wrist doesn't leave his hand.
...what?]
2/2
No dice.
What?!]
What did you do?!
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Wait.]
...it is Monday morning, isn't it?
[Is he going to be stuck to Zelos for a whole week? He might die!]
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[Okay so it didn't actually hurt but that's exceedingly uncomfortable when Kratos tries to bend his digits in a way they don't want to move. His fingers just wont budge!]
If this is a curse it's not funny! There's no way I'm spending a week stuck to you! I'd chew my hand off first!
[Kratos might die? What about Zelos!? There's no way he wants this jerk going everywhere with him for a whole week!
Granted he's being histrionic. He won't gnaw off his own hand. Cutting Kratos' off though...
Well, maybe if things get desperate.]
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Don't be so loud! I doubt that chewing your hand off would work, anyway. The tattoos cannot be removed no matter how hard you try. If it is a curse, we are stuck. We do not have a choice in the matter, so we'll simply have to get along.
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This is the worst curse yet! Getting stuck with you? I'd rather be in a coma!
[No seriously. The very last thing he needs while still recovering from the last curse is mister worst father ever in his personal space for a week.]
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What is it I do that irritates you so much? I would like to avoid doing it.
[Mostly so he doesn't have to listen to Zelos's whining all week.]
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How about ruining lives. Think you can stave off that for a week?
[Contrary to his earlier boisterousness, his tone is low and cold with a biting edge.]
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[Part of Kratos knows. Zelos must hate him for the same reasons he hates himself - for all the things he didn't do, for all the things he continues to not do, for being a coward who is terrified of his own emotions.
For being like him.
He hasn't noticed that particular connection before (always focused on the issue of their respective betrayals), and the sudden realization is evident on his face. When he looks over at Zelos with slightly widened eyes, for just a moment, he feels like he can see right through him.]
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[One hand balls into a fist, the other painfully tight on Kratos' wrist. He knows what that means. The pity, the parallels Zelos hates to have made on his own long ago.]
Don't you dare make that face at me! I am better than you! At least I decided to do something! We're nothing alike, don't even think it!
[He would never abandon family. Not like Kratos. Not like his own father. Never. Even what he did for Cruxis was for Seles, so she'd be comfortable and protected as Chosen. So no, they're nothing alike. Not where it counts.]
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Once he had found out, it still seemed for the best to continue with the journey as it was. He couldn't have known that Lloyd would be the one to change everything. He thought if Colette became the Chosen that Sylvarant would enter a cycle of prosperity again, and that Lloyd could live out his natural life safely. Without him, because he'd certainly never been able to protect the boy.]
Good. Stay that way, Zelos. Don't become me.
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And here's Kratos changing the rules.]
I won't!
[He spits the words like an epithet.]
I'm not even around in the future. I won't have enough time to rack up enough dick points to reach your level.
[It's a comfort and a fear, his speculation that while 4,000 years in their future Kratos will still be rearing kids (and still sucking at it if Dhaos is any indication) while Zelos' presence remains unconfirmed.]
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Then what is it you are so afraid of? Consider it a cautionary tale, do not let yourself grow so upset over the matter. If you are going to be angry with me, then let it be for things I have done and not your own fears.
[If only they could get back home, Kratos would put as much distance between himself and everyone else as he could manage. He'd never hurt any of them again. He doesn't have a choice here though, and he's actually growing tired of the glares of condemnation Zelos shoots him whenever they happen to pass each other.]
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[His tone is cold, derisive. Before he'd been acting like a caged animal, now it seems he's not just trapped with Kratos.
Kratos is trapped with him.]
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[They are trapped together, and he doesn't think he can take a week of hearing Zelos deride him for something he didn't do intentionally.]
I left Cruxis for him, and for Anna. When they caught us they slaughtered her, sent her over the side of a cliff. Lloyd fell as well. I still don't know how he survived, but when I reached the bottom he was gone. There was nothing but blood and mangled bodies and...
[His voice cracks just remembering it.]
...one of his shoes. I thought they were both gone.
[The Seraph's glare is accusatory. Zelos gave up when he was only a child, he wanted a world without emotions even when he knew his sister was still alive. How dare he judge Kratos for that much? Yes, he had made a mistake, he should have looked for Lloyd for longer. He thought all this time that Zelos hated him for his cold demeanor towards Lloyd, for hurting him once he reappeared in his life.
This was like doubting that he'd ever loved his son to begin with.]
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[He physically does the air quotes with one hand.]
Of course, that means jerking him around even more, not to mention sticking me in the whole mess to do your dirty work, all so you could make him kill you. And after he refuses and finds another way? You fly off into goddessdamn space. So yes, you abandoned him!
[With an exasperated, disgusted noise Zelos throws his free hand up.]
But I guess that's what fathers are good for!
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[Was what Zelos did any different? He wanted to make his sister the Chosen to ensure her safety, even if he didn't agree with the system. He didn't plan to be in her life after that. He wanted to die. He played both sides to achieve the outcome he wanted, just like Kratos did. They were the same in so many ways, so why did Zelos...
Ah.
The anger fades from his face as quickly as it showed up. Had this been about his father the whole time?]
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[It's odd to defend himself when he knows Kratos is right. He was going to. If it hadn't been for his talk with Lloyd at Flanoir, he probably would have, but Kratos doesn't know how he agonized over it, who to throw his lot in with. He'd made the right choice, but it had just been a roll of the dice. It could have easily turned out differently...
In some timeline it did. He thinks back to that weird dreaming castle, where another Lloyd had hit him and embraced him and cried about the fact that he'd died.
But he didn't do it. He couldn't do it, and that made him better than Kratos. He hangs onto that fact like a lifeline and opens his mouth to defend himself again when he catches sight of Kratos' even face. He'd been snapping just a moment ago. What had changed?]
What?
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That was when Zelos started behaving towards him in a particularly hostile fashion, wasn't it? When he found out that Kratos was a father.]
It doesn't matter anymore. Do as you please.
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A second ago it mattered a hell of a lot. What is your deal!?
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Still, he should at least confirm it.]
I may be a father and a coward, but do you think every father is that way?
[Is that all they're good for in his mind? Is that really what this is about?]
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[He stops for a moment and scowls thunderously at Kratos, wishing with every fiber that he could pull his hand away and end this conversation.]
Why the hell am I talking to you about this.
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[It's really all very simple.]
We will not be able to reconcile if that is how you look at it, so this conversation no longer matters.
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[There's less bite in his quip; it comes out more as a statement of fact, something they both knew already. He licks his lips, an old nervous habit he hasn't displayed since he was small.]
I just don't want Lloyd turning out like you. Or me for that matter, because of you.
[A small grit of his teeth.]
But for whatever crazy reason, he wants you in his life somehow and as far as I'm concerned that should be the only thing concerning you.
[It's difficult to say this. Somehow, it's like speaking to his own father when he's finally too tired to shout.]
I can't stand parents who don't show they care about their kids. Lloyd especially deserves better.
[Maybe I deserved better...
...what a joke.
He drops both hands to his sides, not realizing in his introspection that he's gotten free.]
Just do me- do Lloyd a favor and if we get out of here with our memories intact, you better stick around as long as he wants you to.
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[Oh, Anna. Why couldn't Anna show up here? She would tell him what to do, she would set everything straight and Lloyd would have a proper parent.]
I do not want to leave Lloyd. Especially not now, when we are becoming... friends. But there is no choice. Most half-elves that became Angels did not even know what was happening to them. They would be helpless. Lost, without any cause, ripe and ready to be slaughtered.... or to do the slaughtering.
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[The words are out of his mouth before he knows he's thought them, bypassing his brain entirely.]
You've got something to stay for, so I'll do it. I know what's like to be an angel, and I'm no slouch with the fighting.
[His brain catches up with his mouth and gives him a withering feeling. Had he just said that...? He doesn't want that at all, much less for Kratos' sake, but it's out there now. He can't take it back.]
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[He closes his eyes.]
Lloyd has become a fine man without me. He has you, and Dirk, and everyone else. It is time for me to stop running. The existence of those angels is on my shoulders. Though the way Dhaos acts suggests a tragic ending, if we do leave here with our memories, I plan on preventing that. I won't allow them to go to war.
[Then he opens them, looking at Zelos.]
You must do the same for Aselia. If we leave with what we know now, Lloyd will be an angel as well. He will live long enough to prevent what may happen. Help him. And...
[He glances off again.]
Perhaps, in a thousand years or so, when the world has forgotten Cruxis, if they have learned to feel... I will bring the angels back.
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...Though... honestly, if he thinks about it logically, it's better that way. He can't let Colette take on all the politics surrounding the Chosen position alone, nor does he really want to leave when he finally was starting to feel like he's worth something other than a pretty face.
Zelos looks at his hands for a moment, the shoves them in his pockets. Perhaps they'll each protect the world in their own ways. Not that he's about to turn this into a feelings jam of any sort.]
Guess it wasn't for the whole week. I'll talk to Zelda about the crest, you go do... whatever it is you do these days.
[There's not much bite left; his tone still holds venom, but it's impotent, more out of habit than actual fury and bluster.]
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But for once, he looks back before he leaves. It lasts only a brief moment, and then he's gone.]